We made up punny names for New Jersey marijuana dispensaries to cope with election anxiety

Listen, it's been a long 24 hours.

As of early Monday morning, there was no clear winner in the 2020 presidential election. We might get an answer today? Who knows. Will democracy survive? LOL, I mean maybe?

But we do know that New Jersey voted to legalize recreational marijuana, along with a number of other states with weed on the ballots. Then we saw this tweet.

Tweet may have been deleted

Our broken, exhausted, internet-poisoned brains latched onto this idea. We needed something else to think about. And if you're feeling overwhelmed, tired, and stressed as hell, I recommend making some dumb Jersey dispensary puns. As a Sopranosloving workplace, we almost immediately started firing off Sopranos/generic Italian-American nonsense puns in our Slack.

The brilliance of Bada Bong. Amazing. I then added my personal favorite:

From then, we were off to the races. Things soon moved to another Jersey icon: Bruce Springsteen.

Our Boss dispensary ideas included:

• Buds Springsteen

• Dankness on the Edge of Town

• Dancing in the Dank

• Tenth Avenue Smoke Out

• The Stoned Pony

• A Spliff in July, Asbury Park

• Glory Daze

Then onto Jersey boy Jon Bon Jovi:

• Jon Bong Jovi

• Bon Joint-vi

• Bad Medicine

• Zooted, Dead or Alive

And if people in Jersey love anything, they love The Godfather:

• An Offer You Can't Refuse

• Horse Head in Bud

• The Budfather

• Leaves and Bud, Take the Doobie (yes, this is a major stretch)

We also did even more basic Italian/Sopranos nonsense:

• BAKED ziti

• Paulie gualtieREEFER

• KUSHamanos

• Are You Tokin' to Me

And then some general Jersey Things (TM):

• Hashbury Park

• New Jersey Lit Rail

• Budgers University

• The Joint

• It's Actually a Really Lovely State With a Great Coast OK?!? Weed

Anyway, that was how we passed the time this morning and redirected energy as everything hung in the balance. It was nice. Maybe do the same? Or at least have a few laughs while you can — it's going to be a long couple of days.

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